How To Set God Sized Goals

I am so in love with this book by Mark Batterson! It has helped me to think about goal setting in a whole new way. A way that I believe will actually turn my goals into accomplishments! Please watch this short video to hear about why you want to set God sized goals & then read on to learn how!

How to Set Goals That Become Accomplishments

1. Start with Prayer! If you can, go away somewhere. The woods, the beach, even just your backyard. But get somewhere where you can be alone & have quiet. Start with a prayer. In the book Mark says: “If you set goals in the context of prayer, there is a much higher likelihood that your goals will glorify God, & if they don’t glorify God, then they aren’t worth setting in the first place! So ask God to help you find & define the goals you need to set.

2. Check Your Motives. “If you are setting selfish goals, you would be better off spiritually not accomplishing them at all.” Make sure you are going after your goals for the right reasons. Yes, we all want to be rich, but to who much is given, much is expected, so be sure you are willing to share your good fortune once you receive it. Or better yet, have a charity or cause in mind that will start benefiting from your success right away, even before you reach your goal. Just make sure it isn’t all about you & that brand new sports car you want to drive.

3. Think in Categories. Think of who you want to help or think of the areas in your life that need attention…family, finances, physical fitness, community. Then write out what you can do for each category to improve those areas. Set goals for each one.

4. Be Specific! “If your goal isn’t measurable, you have no way of knowing if you’ve accomplished it!” You can’t just say you want to lose weight or make more money. How much weight do you want to lose or how much money do you want to make & just for extra measure, set a date to reach that goal!

5. Write It Down. I talked about this in my video. You DO have to write it down. There is something about committing something to paper that makes it real. And when you post it where you can see your goals every day it helps you to stay accountable!

6. Include Others. “Goals are relational glue.” If you set a goal WITH someone, it bonds you & it will double your joy when you accomplish it! Besides, there is no better way to stay on track than to have an accountability partner!

7. Celebrate Along The Way. This is something I do with my Younique team. Whenever someone reaches a goal, no matter how big or small, I give them what we call a shout out! When you are new to something & feel like you are climbing a huge mountain to the top, stopping to celebrate milestones makes the climb seem shorter! And it keeps you motivated to get to the next celebration!

8. Dream BIG! Your list should include not just short term goals, but LONG term goals. Goals that will take years to accomplish! Short term goals are important to get you to the next step, but long term goals are great to focus on when you need a minute to step back & silah, stop & rest. They help you remember the big picture & they also help you to rely on God.

9. Think Long. Sometimes we get stuck in needing to just make it to next week. But stop & think about where you want to be in 5 & 10 years. Lots of things will change in your life during that time. You need to think ahead to what your life will look like & where you want to be in that time. What goals do you need to set to make your dream future a reality?

10. Pray Hard. Goal setting begins & ends with prayer. When you pray about your goals, they become ordained by God. Those prayers become accomplishments. Always be praying & never cease. God will bring to you everything you need to reach your goals.

Happy Goal Setting!


Love Dare, Week 4: Getting To Know God Better

I wanted to drop a quick note on my progress this week. I am really cherishing this time with God. During my time blogging with Girlfriends Coffee Hour, the women there taught me a lot about how the Lord hears me & is with me at all times. Having that knowledge has brought me peace, joy, serenity & did I mention peace?

One of the dares this week is to start a personal devotion time with God & get to know him better. I already do that, every morning at 6:30 it is just me & Him. The house is quiet, my day has yet to get crazy. It is the perfect time to pray, be thankful & read the bible. Then at night I have a shorter quiet time with him. I give thanks again for prayers answered and I thank him for the prayers he is still working on for me, I tell him my prayer requests & I then go through the 23 Psalm. It is the most comforting, serene verse to me. No matter what, it always helps me to calm down and fall asleep peacefully. 23 psalm

I never really wanted to share about my private time with God because I guess I feared people would see me as a “Jesus Freak”. But last night as I was saying my prayers I thought, “So what? What is bad about that? People already know I’m a Christian, why can’t they know about how I spend my time with God?” So I decided today to write about it.

Maybe you are like I once was & just don’t know how to know God better. I didn’t know where to start, what to read, how much time to do it in? I can tell you, none of that matters. Start with reading the bible. Read one passage, read for 5 min. or an hour. Start with the Proverbs. There are 31 of them, so read 1 a day for a month. Or start from the beginning and go from Genesis all the way to Revelation. It doesn’t matter. Just get started. Soon you will get to know God yourself and that He is always with you, always listening and always trying to work out the things in your life for good.

How should you pray? There are no rules for that either. It is best, however, to always give thanks for God for all the blessings in your life. And you will find as you go on, there are many. Submit your requests to God, but you don’t need to repeat them over & over. Submit them, then after that have faith that those prayers will be answered. Thank him daily for continually working out those prayers for your good. You can end your prayer time the way I do, with a favorite verse, or you can just end it with Amen. Just don’t try to be hauty, dragging it out with big words, or repetition. Remember, he hears you the first time. 😉

All of these suggestions are just that, suggestions. They are ones I accumilated over the past few months & made them my own. There is no right or wrong way to pray. He just wants you to start. He craves a relationship with you!

So what does this have to do with the Love Dare? Why is Dr. Chapman making us take a week of our time to get closer to God? Because without the knowledge of the love God has for YOU, you will not be able to love your spouse with the true, deep, agape love God intended you to love with. I just now finally understand that! Enjoy your time with God this week. Accept his love for you in your heart. It is a beautiful, wonderful feeling.

Til next time, kids…



Love Dare, Day 16: Love Intercedes

This was a beautiful chapter. It focuses completely on prayer. I am a big believer in prayer. It has worked for me many times in my life. I believe God hears every prayer I send his way. And I have learned that he answers it, not always the way I want, but in the way He knows is best. Prayer is the way I start and end my day. It is very important to me.

I can’t do this chapter justice by just doing my little cliff notes on it. If you have the book, really pay attention to every word in this chapter. I believe it holds the answers to every problem you have with your spouse. Let’s get started…

Beloved, I pray that in all respects you may prosper and be in good health, just as your soul prospers.

3 John 2

I figured this out a long time ago: “You cannot change your spouse.” MKB is strong-willed. He will not do what he does not want to do. I can’t change his mind once it is set. There is one incident in his life where people think I influenced his decision, but that just shows they don’t know MKB. He listens to no one. I gave up trying to mold him into what I wanted him to be a long time ago. That is not to say I have not been frustrated to no end with his stubbornness & WISH I could change him. At this point, Dr. Chapman says I need to just accept MKB as he is & start to become a “wise farmer”.

I need to plant a seed of love in fertile ground, just as a real farmer does. I need to nurture it & protect it from “weeds”. Then I need to give it to God. I need to pray that my seed will grow strong. Not every seed will grow, just like there is no guarantee that all these dares will change MKB. But I’m not doing these dares to change him. I’m doing them to change me. To return to the person I once was before life happened and I let it take over. I have seen the changes in myself. I’ve calmed down & regained my patience…well some of it. I’ve listened harder & spoke less. I’m feeling good about the efforts I’m putting into this. There are days when I don’t feel like continuing on, but I do it because  I love MKB & I love our marriage.

Birth of our 1st daugther, KKB    May 1999

Birth of our 1st daugther, KKB
May 1999

But I can’t do this alone. I have known that from the beginning. I’m too weak. I give into old patterns the minute something goes wrong. But with prayer to God, I am given super natural strength to get back on track and change my old ways and keep trudging forward. Each day I am rewarded with the feeling of accomplishment.

“Do you feel like giving up on your marriage? Jesus said to pray instead of quitting”: Luke 18:1.

“Are you stressed out and worried? Prayer can bring peace to your storms”: Philippians 4:6-7

“Do you need a major breakthrough? Prayer can make the difference”: Acts 12:1-17

Humble your heart & just pray to God.

I LOVE this last part because it was a total lightbulb moment for me! “Have you ever wondered why God gives you overwhelming insight into your spouses’ hidden faults?” YES!! I do wonder why I can see all that is wrong with MKB & he doesn’t see any of it!!

“It is for effective kneeling.” When you nag, does anything change? No. Try turning that nagging into praying. Pray for exactly what your spouse needs, an open heart, a heart of forgiveness, a better attitude, etc. Praying a strategic prayer will accomplish more than constant nagging. Plus it’s a much more peaceful way to live. We’ve heard this before in a previous chapter. Remember I stated at the beginning of this journey that when God puts something in front of me over and over, He is telling me to sit up and pay attention! So I am listening!

Shoot the moon and  “pray for your hearts desires – for love and honor to become the norm. Pray for romance and intimacy to go to a deeper level.” This is so exciting to me! I am going to start praying for these very things right now! Which brings us to…

Love Dare 16

Love Intercedes

Todays Dare:

Begin praying today for your spouse’s heart. Pray for three specific areas where you desire for God to work in your spouse’s life and in your marriage. I’m on it!

Blessings to you and your spouse. I pray you do this challenge and you have FAITH that God is listening and working for you both this very moment. Amen!

Til next time, kids…